Winter 2012- I’m watching “Lost” on Netflix. It’s my seventh episode. I spent 7 hours staring at a screen, but it isn’t enough because I only have two more episodes left, and I need to know what happens if they leave the island…

Two hours later, and my eyes are stinging. I found out what happened, but my brain is numb. I’m too lethargic to get up from the couch, and I feel horrible. I was supposed to write 2 pages of my book today, but somehow the love triangle between the cute doctor (Jack), Evangeline Lilly (Kate?), and the rebel (Sawyer?) was more important.

You know the feeling you have when you get a D on an exam because you didn’t study? Well, that was how I felt almost every day during Winter 2012. I had plans to write a book, but I just couldn’t bring myself to write. Some days I would get a few pages in, but it wasn’t consistent. My Writer’s Block was seemingly permanent. And my mood suffered because I wasn’t getting work done.

One day, I decided I had enough. I was going to stop this cycle of procrastination. I went to the Dollar Store with my friend, bought a calendar and a book of stickers. Those two items were going to help end my procrastination cycle.

I told myself I was going to write 4 pages a day, and 2 pages on weekends. And I was going to go to the gym 5 days a week for an hour each day. For every day I completed this, I would get a bright sticker on my calendar page.

I looked forward to that bright sticker; I realized the only way I could achieve it was if I “made it easy”. I decided I was just going to write. It didn’t matter if the content wasn’t great; I was simply going to sit down and write.

When I stopped demanding perfection (or even greatness) from myself, the words started flowing. My Writer’s Block retired. Looking back, I realize most of the things I wrote wasn’t extraordinary; I was simply filling pages, and getting my creative juices flowing. I admit, I didn’t use much of the original content in my final book. (The first manuscript is still on my bookshelf.) But I was getting work done, and going to the gym! I was being rewarded with shiny stickers. I was Productive! And I was still getting my “Lost” binges in on weekends.

After a couple of months, I stared at my calendar of shiny stickers, and gave myself a pat on the back. But I wasn’t completely happy. I was tired from constantly typing on my computer, and my routine became monotonous; I was on auto-pilot. At that time, I didn’t spend much time with my friends. It was writing, gym, and Netflix.

When I was on a cruise with my family, I realized how much I was missing. My brother and I went “clubbing” (don’t know if that’s the right term for a ship J), and we met some really fun people. Talking with them reminded me of college, and all the fun times I had with my friends. 

I realized I needed to have a social life! Fortunately I had a college friend who didn’t live far from me, and a few other friends who weren’t too far away. Sometimes we would go to SUNY New Paltz, which was a lot of fun. (I really missed those ducks J.)

In April 2014 I joined Toastmasters which expanded my friendship circle, and helped me venture outside of my comfort zone. And then my Toastmaster friend introduced me to the Mahopac Writer’s Group. I started going there every Thursday, which was a lot of fun. I loved the conversations we had, and we bonded over literature and writing. Everyone in Writer’s Group is interesting; we all have unique styles of writing. And everyone there is nice; they all welcomed me from the moment I stepped in. We always went out to eat afterwards, and the conversations would continue for hours! It was beyond awesome. (And still is J.)

Even though I was making new friends, and being productive, my mood still wasn’t the greatest. I was somewhat content, but a part of me was dissatisfied. I remember walking into the mall during the summer, and having that “blah” feeling envelope me.

In November 2014 my friend introduced me to Abraham Hicks, which is a series of videos on Youtube which focuses on Law of Attraction. I started listening to Abraham Hicks, and saying positive affirmations every single morning. My mood began to pick up. And then I added meditation into the mix. Meditation helped me a lot; I meditate 20 minutes every day. Practicing meditation helped me realize that negative thoughts are powerless. The purpose of meditation is to be still, and “not think”. When a thought comes in, I clear it. It’s hard for me to completely clear my mind. Even now (I’ve been meditating daily for over a year) I’m fortunate if I get 10 seconds of “stillness” in! But I am MUCH more relaxed than I was before I started meditating.

I bought “The Productivity Project: Accomplishing More by Managing Your Time, Attention, and Energy” by Chris Bailey (excellent read, I recommend it) beginning of this year. The author explains that people accomplish more when they are relaxed. When he was working 70 hours a week, he didn’t get a lot accomplished because he was burnt out. He goes into detail about finding your optimal working hours.

One day I edited 100 pages of my memoir, and went to the gym for a workout afterwards. I was proud of my achievement. Only thing was, a few days later I found myself staring blankly at my computer screen. My mind refused to focus because I was exhausted. Two hour later, and I had not written a single word!

I then took the advice offered by “The Productivity Project”. I decided I was going to take a break every time I felt tired. It was easier said than done. Some days I still kept going even though I was tired. I noticed I usually got less work done the following day after I “binge-worked”.

My mood is wonderful when I take breaks! I don’t feel guilty about taking breaks because I know that taking necessary breaks actually increases productivity. I don’t set a timer for relaxing. I just close my eyes and relax. Sometimes I’ll listen to music. I try not to stare at a computer screen when I’m in that state. And I realized that listening to hardcore rap doesn’t help me relax. I tend to listen to boyband music or Selena Gomez when I relax. (I save Jay- Z for car rides.)  And yes, I do get more work done when I’m taking regular breaks.

Enjoying work is possible if you relax. I recommend taking regular breaks, and reading “The Productivity Project” by Chris Bailey. And spending time with friends helps as well. Most importantly, don’t feel guilty when you take breaks. In some countries, “siestas” (afternoon naps) are common.